My Pride Story: Simon

20th June 2022

I want to start this blog post by asking a question: how many of you reading would feel uncomfortable at work talking about your partner? I'd hazard that perhaps for most, you wouldn't necessarily give it much thought: you'd perhaps say on a Monday morning that you did something with your significant other or family over the weekend and not worry how people would react when you mentioned them.

For me it's slightly different. I've worked at South West Water since 2005 and when I first started the thought of someone asking me questions like "What did you do at the weekend?" caused me more than a little nervousness. Being gay and at the time not 'out' at work, I was scared that if I mentioned my partner was a 'him' rather than a 'her', it would negatively affect things for me at work.

I've always had a notion that I go to work to work. Much like you I want to focus on the tasks I need to complete, discuss and debate work and process issues, put my skills to good use, and at the end of the day feel a sense of pride for a job well done before heading home.

But there is a social aspect to the workplace and people inherently talk about their home life as part of normal discussions. My fear back when I started was that if my work colleagues learned that I was gay, at the very least there would be some awkwardness (at least initially), that people might start treating me differently, or worse that I'd start getting bullied, all because of one part of who I am.

Over time I gradually relaxed, got over my fears and eventually let my work colleagues know I was in a long-term relationship with a man. Yes, on a couple of occasions there were awkward moments when they learned this, but for the most part everyone seemed to just accept it and the conversation carried on as normal. And that's the essence of what pride at work means to me: not shouting it from the rooftops or having rainbow flags everywhere but being able to join in with conversations with my colleagues and talk about my partner in the same way as someone in an opposite sex relationship would do.

I'm pleased that while working at South West Water I've not experienced any homophobic bullying and having pride at work also means that I shouldn't be in fear of such things. There may be people who, for whatever reason, may have issues or not fully understand what it means to be gay (or bisexual or trans), but I'd hope that if someone was in that situation, they might feel comfortable speaking with me or other LGBTQ+ colleagues to learn and understand how our lives are just the same as theirs. I know from personal experience that 'coming out' at work can be challenging, but I found that I overcame that by simply talking to my colleagues and being myself.

I'm fortunate to work for a company that embraces diversity and can allow us to be ourselves as individuals. As I mentioned earlier, my focus in the workplace is to work, but I'm glad that I can have my own personal pride not only in the work that I do, but in being able to just be me as a gay man.